Would I say that I hate my life? No, I wouldn't, but there are definitely some things that I wish I could change. I love being a mother and I love my daughter more then anything in this world. Do I wish I could die? Not at all... death is my number one fear in this world. I remain optimistic that one day my ship will sail in, even if I have to swim out to it, and my daughter and I will live happily every after. There's always a rainbow after a storm... and in my case, hopefully an adorable crocheted hat for my daughter.