Sunday, May 15, 2011

Something to Keep You in Stitches

There's jokes for everything you can possibly think of but were you aware of the jokes directed at all of us crocheters? Enjoy!

What do you call a bunch of crocheters working by the side of the road?
A chain gang!

While are crocheters like frogs?
Because they both ripit, ripit, ripit.

We may pull your chain or may just string you along. But in the end we're all fastened off and turned around

A man and woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.
For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife’s bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box.
When he opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents. “When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily.”
“The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious doilies were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness.
“Honey,” he said, “that explains the doilies, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?”
“Oh,” she said, “that’s the money I made from selling the doilies.”

Why couldn't the ball of yarn go play with his
He was all tied up! 

Why are crocheters so funny? 
Because they keep us in stitches! 

What do you call an unmarried stitch? 
A single crochet!

What happened to the naughty little afghan? 
He got into treble!

How many crocheters does it take to change a lightbulb? 
Just one, but when she's done, she's going to want to crochet a cord pull for it, and a light cover, and then she'll need to make matching valances, and of course the whole room will need new doilies and chair covers, and...


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